(scraps)

(Note: These are just little unfinished blurbs. Maybe I'll work them into something bigger, and maybe I'll leave them alone.)

ONE
i wish i could feel something besides the dry burn in my throat and eyes of too many tears.
i wish something besides the weight on my chest felt real.
i wish i knew for sure that this would crush anybody, and that i'm not weak.
but i don't know anything
nothing at all
and all i really want
is to throw my heart against a wall
and i want to see it stop
i want to see it shudder
and i want to hear it scream
as it. stops. beat.ing.

TWO
wanting to be miserable
is not masochism
for me
it's recognition of a job well done
depression
is what i do best.

THREE
the realization
of being a piece
to someone
is damning
it's a death sentence

a piece of ass
a piece of shit
a piece of baggage

and knowing that
is a knife to the heart
cause all i want
is peace.