in search of

i've been finding myself
searching for your face
in every crowd, in every door
on every bus and street
i don't even know your name
and still i've got this
unbridled hope and ball of nerves
sitting home in my stomach
they all ask about the
cuts and bruises, scars and tattoos
no one's seen the blood
under my fingernails yet
lucky since i don't know where it's from
and maybe someday i'll see you
in passing and your words will be
a breeze across dripping sweat shoulders
and maybe you'll tell me to get ready,
the storm's comin.

so we slipped between our sheets of words
and i lost you somewhere in between
i ain't pretty when i cry
cause it's what i look like on the inside
which is where i told you part of me is dead
and you nodded like you knew
and i said let me keep my secrets please
i know you won't look at me the same again
they never do
but i whispered them straight to your mouth
we shared that breath that was a knife
between my ribs
and i said i'm waiting til tomorrow
to see if you take off and run
i won't be mad because i already know
it's nothing new
you told me don't worry
"i'll be here in the morning"
but that's not quite what i meant

i breathe free next to you
and i'm sorry that might stop